Okay, so I could apologize to my (non-existent) readership for not posting for so long. What has it, been? Nine, ten months? Who's counting anyway?
A lot has happened since my last blog post. I have formulated many a thought, continued my studies in many a field, and my family has moved to e new house.
Since I'm reviving this blog like a long dead computer from a different era, the first thing I must visit is the reason, the point of this blog. If you know me, you might know that I strongly dislike the pointless, and in the end that is why I find myself interested in so many topics, to discover the ideas and thoughts behind these arts and skills. And so I must examine the idea behind my own creation, the blog "A Geek of Many Trades".
They say necessity is he mother of invention, and I think the purpose of this blog begins at a problem. I think I originally created the blog because I simply liked the idea, but when I dig deeper into the matter, the real reason is because of the problem I have.
First, of all, back story. I'm an artist. I love to draw, enjoy writing, find happiness in playing music, and I like to dabble in assorted preforming arts (Magic/sleight of hand, acting, and stand-up comedy to name a few).
As with all good artists, I was a consumer before a creator, devouring all the art I could get my hands on, and like all good artists, even as I became a creator, I continued to consume, using other art to inspire my own, taking apart every drawing I saw, understanding the techniques used, dissecting the prose on the pages I read, researching storytelling techniques of the great writers, transcribing my favorite solos and riffs from all my favorite songs, creating new ones based off of the classics, and watching performances, enchanted by the pure skill and practiced inspiration of the many artists on this earth. And so I consumed and created, and the more I learned, the more I realized I did not know,
But back to my problem. There are so many tools for artists to use to create, and almost as many that artists can use to share their creativity. In this digital age, an artist can upload his creations to a multitude of different sites and release their imagination upon the world. Not only is this helpful for the creators, but it's helpful for the consumers, a virtual myriad of art anywhere where they can get an internet connection.
But I find myself avoiding using these tools to share my art, always with the same mantra in my mind, the same reason: It's not finished yet. Even in the physical realm, I have trouble sharing my art. Always the same excuse: It's not finished yet.
And even when it is finished, it's filed away, whether physically or virtually, and hidden with the excuse that it's not good enough. I know I can do better. So I have tons of art that I never share with people, either because "it's not done" or "it's not good enough".
Really, it boils down to the second one. It's not finished yet, so it's not good enough to show people. So at the heart of the matter, I don't share my art with the world because I don't think it's good enough. This is where we get to my problem.
See, my problem is not that I think that my art is not good enough. No, that's a symptom. The root of the problem is that I'm right, it's not good enough, and it's my fault. For you to really understand what I mean by this, you must first understand my views on the fundamental purposes of art in general.
When you look at- no, not look at. That term is too light. Anyone can look at something without really understanding or comprehending it. When you
experience a piece of art, whatever form it may be in, you are judging. I guarantee it. I'm not saying your judging the worth of the art, or even necessarily the artist's skill, but you are judging something. Some pieces of art might have you judging a portion of their skill, maybe their ability to represent real life, maybe their handiwork with a brush. Hard hitting pieces of art will have you judging something bigger than the piece of art itself, maybe judging your thoughts, your life, the amount of time you spend with family, or even the state of the world.
In essence, art will point to something for you to think about, and whether it be the artist or the state of the economy of Asia, a good piece of art will try to change the way you think about a specific subject, even if this state of mind is temporary. I have termed this idea the
impact of a piece of art. Each piece of art will have a different desired impact for the consumer, and accomplish it to different degrees. Depending on what the artist's goal is at the time of creating the art will change the impact it has on the audience.
Likewise, the consumer, his goals, thoughts, worldviews, opinions, even mood, and of course his understanding of the art he is consuming will effect the impact.
As I create a work of art, I will consider the impact I want it to have. That's part of my problem, I focus so much on that sometimes. I don't consider the art complete until it has an effect on me, the creator. Until the desired impact is impacts me.
that is my problem. I am correct in thinking that the art is not finished, because it is not up to my impossible standards. It's not good enough because the audience has booed it off the stage, the audience of one, the director.
So you see, there is my problem with sharing my art. I don't share my art because the people I show it too don't think it's good enough and I only show this art to myself.
It is one of those real life death spirals that can only be fixed by direct intervention of both sides, and that is what I want this blog to be. I want to create art, and share it with anyone who wants to see, whether it fits my standards of art or not. Because in the end, very little of my art will have any impact me. Any impact it would have had probably went on in the creation project. And if I'm honest, my favorite pieces of art, the ones with the most impact on me, are not any of the ones I put in a file in drawer somewhere in my room, not the ones that are sitting in some not often accessed portion of my computers memory, but the ones I've shown to people.
If I remember, one of the moments I really knew I loved being an artist, I was ten- maybe eleven? I don't remember my exact age. It was a family reunion type of thing, relatives distant and close all around, talking. I was sitting there, drawing. The drawing had no impact on me. It had gone from my mind onto the paper, and it was finished, and in my young mind, once the art was done, for me, it was useless. I simply enjoyed the process of creating, watching as my hands clutched the pencil, replicating a piece of my imagination onto the canvas in front of me. It was none of my concern what happened to it after I was done. One of my relatives saw the drawing, my great aunt I think, and loved it. I gave it to her, somehow a younger version of me understanding greater that art is meant to be consumed after it is created more than I do now.
We moved recently, and we have a bin full of old papers that I went through when we were packing. Even though I knew they were there in the back of my mind, I was kind of surprised to see a bunch of my old drawings, from when I was ten, nine, eight- sometimes younger. I can't say making these drawings had very large impact on me. But what made an impact on me more than any piece of art I've created, is watching the impact art has upon it's consumer.
What I often forget, is that art is made to be shared. That is the impact my art has on me. Me seeing the impact it has on the audience. That's what this blog is for. I'm releasing my art into the world, and anyone who wants to see it, can.
Because art that's not seen can never have any impact.
~TNL
